Holidays
32,Zephyr, 1327
There was a small gathering the other sun. We spoke of what to do about the ailment further. Phooka had been experimenting, and not found anything, because, he said, the separation of the samples decayed too quickly before he could study them. My only thoughts centered around where time is no factor, but.. that may be too grand a thought for too small a plot. (A rhyme~) I did not even bother to suggest it, which seems to be just as well off.
Lafey had a much more compelling idea, concerning using a body recently dead. Several of us would use our abilities to view the progress of the ailment in a simulated living body, though without harming someone who is living now. She said she will write up her idea and give it to those of us who will be taking part. I wonder if I will get one of these letters.
She mentioned Augurs, and though I believe I wish to take such a path, I am not yet considered fit for such a title. I am not certain how much I must know of the other paths, and while all are interesting, they do not feel right to me. I do love to create, but through word, will, and Chaos. I do love to explore, but it is to learn what I may find there, and seldom can I remember where I have been, even with a map. My sense of direction is poor, I think for many reasons - the Chaos does not aid me here - and I would not like to be looked to for that. I can fight, and.. there are some I would protect, but I easily fall in focus to other matters. I am no sentinel unless there is none other fitting. What I am interested in is magic, knowledge, the energy in which the world turns from, the Secrets it holds, and how to Bend it to make something greater still. I think this is why Augur would fit me best.
That is, though, a bit of an off branch. And.. [spot] there are other matters that occupy my thoughts. We spoke some of sylvari's awakening and their Wyld Hunts. It seems Androsace is a Dreamer, and that she has been given a Wyld Hunt which goads at her being. Is it wrong of me to feel the way I do? I do not wish to harm her, or wish her ill; in fact, I feel compelled to help her find the path she seeks. Though the concept of a Wyld Hunt is something I find frightening. A purpose chosen for us, the inevitability, that even if ignored, it will always be eating at the roots to be heeded. [spot]
I do not wish to think of what crossed my mind. I simply do not like the thought of us not being able to choose for ourselves what our lives will be drawn to. On one branch, there is a sense of purpose, that the Mother Tree, the Dream, or even something else may have awakened us for a reason and that reason calls to us. But on the other, what if we do not like that reason? What if that reason takes us far from all we feel close to, and the only satisfaction in it is stopping that eating at the roots? Is it all that inevitable? What of all the other wonderous choices out there that we can never pay attention to, because we are so focused on that single reason? What if one of them would have led to something so much greater? How can one ever really know themselves if they cannot choose where they want to go, and why should they feel a sort of suffering for wanting something different?
I am glad I do not know such a calling. I have my own calling, and it was a Choice, even if it has set me behind and I have lost some of what I seek. "Know that your sacrifices are worth your freedom. Always have a Choice." [spot]
If Androsace finds the answer to her Hunt, will she be able to make a choice then too? Will that gnawing ever leave her, or if she strays, even after she's found it and if she does not like her path, will it gnaw on still? Would she get her choice after she has done what she is drawn to do? I don't have any of these answers. I can only hope that, if she follows her Hunt, whatever it is she says she is drawn to protect fulfills her and makes her bloom more than anything else could have.
* A break from obligations.
* Also a day of celebration.
* Birthdays
* Also a day of celebration.
- sometimes more than one occurs at the same time.
- more money you have, more you can take
- less you like human society, the more you can have. (but not exactly? I believe it may be a matter of not respecting human societal obligations; at least that seems logical, if it is 'that but not that'.)
- there was something else, but I did not understand.
- more money you have, more you can take
- less you like human society, the more you can have. (but not exactly? I believe it may be a matter of not respecting human societal obligations; at least that seems logical, if it is 'that but not that'.)
- there was something else, but I did not understand.
* Birthdays
- a day in which humans celebrate their birth
- it is the same date number each cycle of seasons
- they go to places they like, and other humans give them gifts
- they mentioned us choosing a day for ourselves
[the writing below looks as though it was added at a different time; it is a slightly different size than the writing before it, and also a tad neater]
Note: I do not know which day to choose yet. That they wish to bring us into their celebrations is.. warming. It is an unexpected connection with them, and that makes it special, so I would like to pick a good number. But because it is for me, it must also be one that feels right. [ink blot] It is that case again where I feel like something is familiar, but I cannot remember. Perhaps I knew something about this at one time. Perhaps it was another thing that I have lost. [spot] I don't know if I want to grasp at that familiarity, to reach for the familiar scent and see if the flower matches that vision, or choose something entirely different.
- it is the same date number each cycle of seasons
- they go to places they like, and other humans give them gifts
- they mentioned us choosing a day for ourselves
[the writing below looks as though it was added at a different time; it is a slightly different size than the writing before it, and also a tad neater]
Note: I do not know which day to choose yet. That they wish to bring us into their celebrations is.. warming. It is an unexpected connection with them, and that makes it special, so I would like to pick a good number. But because it is for me, it must also be one that feels right. [ink blot] It is that case again where I feel like something is familiar, but I cannot remember. Perhaps I knew something about this at one time. Perhaps it was another thing that I have lost. [spot] I don't know if I want to grasp at that familiarity, to reach for the familiar scent and see if the flower matches that vision, or choose something entirely different.
_________________________________________________________________
32,Zephyr, 1327
There was a small gathering the other sun. We spoke of what to do about the ailment further. Phooka had been experimenting, and not found anything, because, he said, the separation of the samples decayed too quickly before he could study them. My only thoughts centered around where time is no factor, but.. that may be too grand a thought for too small a plot. (A rhyme~) I did not even bother to suggest it, which seems to be just as well off.
Lafey had a much more compelling idea, concerning using a body recently dead. Several of us would use our abilities to view the progress of the ailment in a simulated living body, though without harming someone who is living now. She said she will write up her idea and give it to those of us who will be taking part. I wonder if I will get one of these letters.
She mentioned Augurs, and though I believe I wish to take such a path, I am not yet considered fit for such a title. I am not certain how much I must know of the other paths, and while all are interesting, they do not feel right to me. I do love to create, but through word, will, and Chaos. I do love to explore, but it is to learn what I may find there, and seldom can I remember where I have been, even with a map. My sense of direction is poor, I think for many reasons - the Chaos does not aid me here - and I would not like to be looked to for that. I can fight, and.. there are some I would protect, but I easily fall in focus to other matters. I am no sentinel unless there is none other fitting. What I am interested in is magic, knowledge, the energy in which the world turns from, the Secrets it holds, and how to Bend it to make something greater still. I think this is why Augur would fit me best.
That is, though, a bit of an off branch. And.. [spot] there are other matters that occupy my thoughts. We spoke some of sylvari's awakening and their Wyld Hunts. It seems Androsace is a Dreamer, and that she has been given a Wyld Hunt which goads at her being. Is it wrong of me to feel the way I do? I do not wish to harm her, or wish her ill; in fact, I feel compelled to help her find the path she seeks. Though the concept of a Wyld Hunt is something I find frightening. A purpose chosen for us, the inevitability, that even if ignored, it will always be eating at the roots to be heeded. [spot]
I do not wish to think of what crossed my mind. I simply do not like the thought of us not being able to choose for ourselves what our lives will be drawn to. On one branch, there is a sense of purpose, that the Mother Tree, the Dream, or even something else may have awakened us for a reason and that reason calls to us. But on the other, what if we do not like that reason? What if that reason takes us far from all we feel close to, and the only satisfaction in it is stopping that eating at the roots? Is it all that inevitable? What of all the other wonderous choices out there that we can never pay attention to, because we are so focused on that single reason? What if one of them would have led to something so much greater? How can one ever really know themselves if they cannot choose where they want to go, and why should they feel a sort of suffering for wanting something different?
I am glad I do not know such a calling. I have my own calling, and it was a Choice, even if it has set me behind and I have lost some of what I seek. "Know that your sacrifices are worth your freedom. Always have a Choice." [spot]
If Androsace finds the answer to her Hunt, will she be able to make a choice then too? Will that gnawing ever leave her, or if she strays, even after she's found it and if she does not like her path, will it gnaw on still? Would she get her choice after she has done what she is drawn to do? I don't have any of these answers. I can only hope that, if she follows her Hunt, whatever it is she says she is drawn to protect fulfills her and makes her bloom more than anything else could have.
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